Except for a period of crippling pre-teen insecurity, I’ve always been a personable guy. I've even been able to parlay that into a pretty successful career in sales. With that being said, I am actually, at my core, a bit of a loner - an extroverted introvert, if you will.
One of my favorite things about solo travel is meeting strangers. I don't know what it is about me, but people frequently strike up conversations and proceed to tell me their life stories. And I’m usually curious to hear them.
(IYKYK. If you don't get the reference, do yourself a favor and watch one of the best television scenes of all time here)
Occasionally, I will really click with people and stay in touch, but more often than not I have an interesting conversation, then never see them again. These are my single-serving friends.
(The first rule is: Don’t talk about it)
Here are a handful of the single serving friends I’ve met so far on my trip, and several I think I'll hold on to.
MATTHEW
I met Matthew at Dino’s Pizza on the Quinault Reservation during the Superbowl. He is a member of the Quinault Indian Nation, whose land is sandwiched between the Pacific Ocean and Olympic National Park. He is one of the people that hunts - mostly deer and elk - to help feed the tribe. He's done just about every job you can think of over the years - from truck mechanic to garbageman.
He’s slowed in the last year though, since his injury. He was cleaning his .44 Magnum in the front seat of his truck when his dog jumped up from the back seat, making the gun go off. He shot himself point blank in the leg, and showed me the nasty scar to prove it.
He taught me how to say “thank you” in Quinault. Phonetically “Mah-say koo-yoo koo koo-nahl”
BRADLEY
I met Bradley at The Silver Dollar Tavern in Coos Bay. We bought each other whiskey shots until I could barely stumble up the hill back to my Airbnb. Bradley comes from a dairy farming family in Tillamook. He is from Dutch ancestry and damn proud of it. “If you ain’t Dutch, you ain’t much”, and “As a finishing touch, God made the Dutch” were two of his favorite aphorisms. His Dutch grandfather, along with three Americans, were the scouting party that discovered Dachau in 1945. His grandfather ran back with the news to notify the rest of the 42nd “Rainbow” Division, who liberated the concentration camp.
Bradley works part-time as a contractor for the FDA, doing surprise inspections of dairy producing facilities. He was involved in a big multi-day shutdown of an Amish dairy business on the east coast a few years ago. He was in Coos Bay that week inspecting Umpqua Dairy, who passed with flying colors.
(he allowed me to take his picture, but didn't want his face to appear on the blog)
TY & JOE
As I write about in my NEVADA post, I met Ty and Joe at the Border Inn Casino along the Nevada/Utah border, just outside Baker. When the power went out, I chatted with them at the dark bar for over an hour until the lights came back on.
Ty grew up in rural Nevada around Baker. He sells credit card processing systems to local businesses and runs big game hunting trips for wealthy out-of-towners who want a trophy. He cleans the kills after, sending the clients home with whatever meat they want, then donates the rest to local people in need. He is a staunch advocate for ice plunges and takes one each morning and evening. Once you make it past 10 minutes, he told me, it becomes an almost spiritual, out-of-body experience.
Joe is a gentle stoner from Missouri. After a couple of decades as an EMT and ER nurse, he was burned out. He had a nasty breakup and decided to move west to take things easy. Now, in addition to bartending and working at the front desk of The Border Inn, he spends his time hunting for gold with a metal detector in mining ghost towns. He hasn’t found his big score yet.
STEPHANIE
I was connected to Stephanie by Liz and James who run the Stargazer Inn and Bristlecone General Store in Baker, NV. I met them while grabbing coffee before heading into Great Basin National Park. They liked the idea of my trip, so they posted about it on their Instagram. Stephanie saw the post and commented that I should visit Kanab, UT next. Since Utah was next on my itinerary, I reached out and booked her cabin for the week.
Stephanie runs the Paria River Ranch 40 minutes outside of Kanab. Before buying the ranch, she had been living in Malibu, CA. After a difficult divorce, she pursued her dream of establishing an animal sanctuary with her new partner. Circumstances conspired to give her the opportunity to buy this piece of gorgeous land. The ranch hosts horse camping, tours, and equine therapy excursions. She runs Earth Angels Animal Rescue and Sanctuary out of the ranch, named after her first rescue, a mule named Angel.
KEN & KENDRA
I met Ken & Kendra at The Anchor in Wichita, KS while watching the NCAAW Semi-Final games. "Ken and Barbie", as his ex-wife calls them, had recently moved to Wichita. Kendra works for a company that chases insurance companies down to get payment for medical claims. Ken is retired. For years, she had been commuting 45 minutes each way to Wichita for her job, so they finally decided to move there.
Ken wasn't particularly interested in womens' sports, but Kendra was excited to watch Caitlin Clark, and Ken had to admit that Clark was fun to watch. They recommended I visit Woolaroc, which I wrote about in my OKLAHOMA post.
NANCY & JOE
I sat next to Nancy & Joe at the bar for dinner at Boston Title and Abstract in downtown Tulsa. He works as a mediator for divorces and she clerks for a judge on the US Court of Appeals who was appointed by Jimmy Carter. Their daughter was vacationing in Prague while they watched her 4.5 lb dog.
MARC
I met Marc at The Buttered Biscuit in Fayetteville, AR after he had just come from church. He wore an ill-fitting suit and one of his hands was bandaged. I didn’t ask what had happened.
Marc was fresh out of prison and staying with his dad in Fayetteville to get his life together and hopefully re-establish a relationship with his daughter. He is a devout man who turns to God for the strength to keep making moral choices. He told me that when he meets people who don’t believe in God because they can’t see him, he asks them “Do you believe in WiFi?” Game, set, and match.
Marc aspires to create a charity to help kids from difficult backgrounds by teaching them music. He recommended some songs including Hurricane by The Band of Heathens, which has become one of my favorite music discoveries on this trip.
EMMA
I met Emma while she was bartending at Tony’s NY Style Pizza in Fayetteville. She had moved up from Houma, LA a year prior, which was her first move away from home. She had dropped out of college and was a server at local restaurants, but felt weird when people she went to high school with would come into the restaurant and she had to wait on them. She wanted a clean break, so she moved up to Arkansas.
The thing that she misses most about home is a local brand of canned red beans and rice that she can’t get in Fayetteville. Apparently, some of the best food in Louisiana can be found at gas stations, although some of the worst too - so you need to be careful. She tipped me off to an "influencer", Devin Snow, who has built an audience on social media with his RB&R segments where he reviews a new place’s red beans and rice every week. He’s been doing it since 2020.
JANELLE & JULES
I met Janelle & Jules in the betting line at The Kentucky Derby.
Jules runs a local salon, doing hair. She explained her philosophy of never discounting or giving anyone a deal for their haircut. It devalues what you do, and erodes the ability to get good word of mouth. She'd rather have fewer clients paying what she’s worth than a bunch of cheap clients trying to get a bargain.
Janelle was up from Atlanta for the race. She had a bunch of bets from her co-workers, including her CEO, to place at the track, but wasn’t planning on staying for the race. They were heading to a party after the bets were in. Apparently it's an important part of the experience to place the bets in person.
In order to claim a winning bet you need to mail in the physical ticket and wait a few weeks to get a check. Seemed to me like an awful lot of unnecessary work but hey, “tradition” I suppose.
VILSON
Vilson and his wife are from Kosovo. They run Anna’s Greek Restaurant in Bowling Green, KY. The restaurant and event space is housed in a converted church. It was built in 1905 as a Presbyterian church, then it was two different Baptist churches. It had fallen into disrepair. He bought it at auction for $170K and put a ton of money into overhauling it. According to him, a higher power had seen to it that he find this gem of a location. He kept touches from the church - the organ pipes (though the organ was too expensive to repair), the stained glass, and the bar is made from the back from one of the pews.
Vilson has a background in IT and engineering. He manages the restaurants, and his wife cooks. He had just finished a huge project to put a POS system in place to run the restaurant. In order to get the capabilities he wanted, he pressured the software company to build the features, then hacked the system himself when he didn't get what he wanted. He is proud that he treats his employees so well that they see him as a father figure and come back to work for him on big days. The upcoming Sunday when I met him was Mother’s Day, one of their busiest days of the year.
ADAM
I met Adam at Dublin's Irish Pub in Bowling Green, KY. He works for the Marines. After a couple of deployments, he moved to an administrative job within the Corps. He is responsible for recruiting stations within his territory, which includes Kentucky and Indiana. He travels most of the time, checking in on recruiting stations, making sure they’ve got everything they need to be effective.
ANDY & JERRY
I met Andy, Jerry, and a slew of other amazing people at The Paddle Bar in Sandusky, OH.
Andy is a soft-spoken and unassuming guy, but also an expert on weapons of mass destruction. He has had diplomatic assignments in Kazakhstan, Hong Kong, Germany, and Saudi Arabia and is fluent in Russian. He has also spent extensive time in Japan, where his favorite bar is. He was appointed by Barack Obama for a defense role while he was in office. Andy was interviewed for the recent Netflix documentary Turning Point: The Bomb and the Cold War.
Andy moved to Sandusky, which he calls the “remote worker’s paradise”, with his wife and young daughter. He recently purchased a historic 1800’s limestone home in downtown Sandusky which was most recently home to a local law firm. Its carriage house has been converted into a local theater. He wants to make the house into a co-working space or use it for other purposes that could benefit the community and bring more attention to Sandusky. He toured me through the house, let me use it for work while I was there, and solicited ideas on creative uses for the space.
Jerry is a big, gregarious racontouer. He crewed a submarine as a young enlisted man. He is an aviation enthusiast and pilot. He worked for decades in the film industry as a cameraman and specialized in air mounts and shots involving flying. He told me a story that one time he was shooting out the door of a small aircraft which caught fire. He had to hold onto the camera and jump out of the plane with a parachute. He landed safely on the ground, and the producer came running over to him. The first question was “How’s the camera?”
Jerry is also a food enthusiast. He’s had the chance to travel all over with film productions, and has sought out the best restaurants everywhere he’s gone - not the fanciest, the best. If you're ever curious about visiting somewhere, he can recommend restaurants. He has amassed, through all sorts of means, a collection of recipes for the best dishes he’s found. He assembled these recipes in a book, which he self-published, making only 100 copies. He graciously gifted me his last copy. The only stipulation was that if anyone ever wanted one of the recipes, I had to share it. So hit me up.
BETH & JASON
I was introduced to Beth and Jason by Tom, one of the crew I met at the Paddle Bar. They met when they worked together at The Sandusky Register. They are both long distance runners and compete in Ironman Races. They have the goal to run a marathon in every state, and have managed 15 already.
Beth is now the Executive Editor for a weekly local newsletter called The Helm Sandusky, and she teaches English. She wrote a profile about me for The Helm. Jason, her husband and "intern", is her photographer. He works for the city, organizing all their community events. He also manages the floral arrangements outside the courthouse including the clock/calendar that changes every day .
We all met for a photoshoot in a local park with a United States map painted on the basketball court. They then invited me to join them on the first Happy Thursday Bike Ride of the year. That week's theme - hats.
CHIP, MOLLY, BRANDON, and LAURIE
I met this crew while staying with my friends Brad & Carolyn on Martha's Vineyard. Chip and Molly are their neighbors, Brandon is Chip's brother, and Laurie is Brandon's wife. Chip and Molly had come to my friends' rescue a few years ago to help them convince the city to give them the permit they needed to renovate their house. They've been thick as thieves ever since.
We all went out to dinner at The Atlantic in Edgartown. After the dinner was over, there was a commotion at the bar. Apparently, a couple of minority owners of the Celtics had been dining at the members-only club upstairs, and had brought the NBA Championship trophy with them to show off. Chip and I worked our way to the front of the crowd to take pictures with it.
(Chip with a bunch of randos and the hardware)
Less than halfway through this trip, this is just a small sample of the wonderful and weird people I’ve met. Most of them were single serving friends, but I've also made some connections that will last a lifetime.
This trip has only reinforced my love for solo travel and the fascinating stories you can hear by just showing up, being curious and FRIENDLY.
Yes, and…
Matt
Comments